Yesterday was fun. We jumped again with jump-rope and barbecued and got drunk and went to Rentukka and then back to our place. I also called Jesse and got a good laugh when he asked (and we talked about my thesis) "can I have a testicle cancer in my brains?". I laughed so much!
J-P and Maria are so cute... at the background we're jumping.
Me, Kirsikka and Reija
Me and Kirsikka dancing, after this song Kirsikka bended me back too much and I spilled our drinks over my computer (luckily not over my laptop).And it's funny, we went to sleep at 4 am which is only hour later than we usually go to sleep! And woke up at noon which is also normal in these days. And I'm not having hang over because I drunk water (about 2 liters) before I went to bed. And that's good.
5 days!!! I can imagine being abroad but I can't imagine traveling alone there... But I can still remember how it was so exciting to travel by train to Tampere and back for the first times. Muaha! Or to Savonlinna and I had to change to bus and I had never traveled there before. It's not that it's not exciting to travel with someone, but alone! I don't know why it's such a big deal. Maybe because I've used to be with Tarmo everywhere I go. Or that I'm not that experienced in traveling and I fear that I get lost (right...) or confused (could happen!) or I get so nervous that I can't speak English (right...) or I miss my flight (so what?) or or... I still know that this will develop me and I want to experience this. But it still scares me.
I know that traveling alone doesn't mean that I won't be social or get company on my way, I know that I will look so frightened that someone more experienced will come and chat with me, muaha! No, I mean that I'm so social that I'll chat with people anyway and that'll relieve my fears. I know that there will be other people who are just in the same situation that I'm in. And it's no point thinking (seriously) what if questions. If something happens then it happens.
I'm not so nervous about actually being at Iowa, not knowing anyone. Well, I almost know someones there. But whole new environment doesn't make me nervous. I know that there are so many other people who I'll meet who are just in the same situation, and I know how to get to the hotel, I'll get my breakfast there on Saturday morning and then my temporary roommate Paola will come and then, then we'll go to check out the city or something. But then I have someone who I can talk with. And it's not that I couldn't go and check out the city by myself but it's the company. And still the airports scare me. Not the flying itself but the airports. All the security checks make me nervous (as they're supposed to do I think) and as being control freak I fear that my tickets are wrong (aren't), my bags include something prohibited (don't), flights will be late (matters only if the flight from Helsinki to Dublin is hours late) or or or... And here I go again.
But still I need to think about these things. I still wait when I'll start crying to Tarmo that I'll miss him, I don't want to leave him and our cats and home, I want him to come with me. The hardest part of this exchange thing is that we'll be separated for four-five months. We're so close to each other and we are used to cuddle, chat and just be with each other every day. We'll still talk to each other every day in the internet but it's not the same. I need comfort and Tarmo gives it to me. But we'll manage. I can only wait the Christmas when he comes there.
And the kitties. I will miss them too, I'm so used to someone soft and warm to curl around my leg or back when I take nap or some black tail to sweep me now and then. Sigh. I will miss my friends and family too. But then again, it's only half a year. It goes by so fast and then I'm suddenly back.
I did this choice to go overseas. I did this choice to miss everyone (not that I could make a choice not to miss anyone, muaha). This is one of my dream come true. Oh I get so excited!
Today is going to be a hang over day though I don't have hang over. This means that I don't need to dress up or go to anywhere. I can just relax. Nice.
